I was surprised at the guilty verdict of Sean Patrick Banks, locally known as the dating site rapist. He faces up to 40 years to life when sentenced in September. It is not that I believe that he is innocent, but from what I have read, most of the evidence submitted seems circumstantial. There was no DNA or what I consider hard evidence, but plenty of damaging support through testimonies, text messages, using an alias and other actions he took.
I was surprised at the guilty verdict of Sean Patrick Banks, locally known as the dating site rapist. He faces up to 40 years to life when sentenced in September. It is not that I believe that he is innocent, but from what I have read, most of the evidence submitted seems circumstantial. There was no DNA or what I consider hard evidence, but plenty of damaging support through testimonies, text messages, using an alias and other actions he took.
Circumstantially, I find him guilty of all charges, but I believe that his defense has a strong case for retrial. That would be a shame, as the victims would have to relive this horrible ordeal again. But there is a message in this scenario that is hard to accept, yet needs to be heard.
Over the weekend, a post on Facebook from a friend led me to the site NoMore.org. This is one of many organization utilizing the familiar faces of celebrities and victims of domestic and sexual violence to bring awareness and help for victims, family and friends.
Staggering, it reports that still, currently a majority of Americans never discuss these issues with children or friends and 65 percent of victims that come forward say that no one helped them. They stand alone with no hope.
As difficult as it is, sometimes in life, we do have to stand alone. But coming forward has been a problem due to the stigmas surrounding abuse and assault. It is time as a community to stand together and say no more violence. As a victim at a very early age, I did not come forward. I knew no better, but as an adult, I know that I let a sexually abusive person get away, with a huge probability of other victims. Sexual and domestic violence is not normally a one-time thing.
One of my best friends in high school was a victim of domestic violence. His parents where drunks, and would come into his bedroom in the middle of the night and beat on him. I know this because the one time I spent the night there, it happened, even with me in the same room. Being older, I told my mother and one day when my father asked why he was always around, she quickly told him the truth. He never said another word, and our house became a sanctuary for him throughout the remainder of school.
As hard as it is, victims and witnesses have to step forward. I do not believe we are ever alone. So many resources out there openly discuss what to do for sexually and physically abused victims. As scary as it is, it is important for victims to come forward immediately, before all hard evidence is gone. DNA, bruises and scars are the best evidence in putting these criminals in jail and them staying there.
No one is exempt from abuse. A worldwide problem, this affects all genders, ages, races and social standings. There is hard evidence that there is an increase of assault in the military, on campuses and in the home. And men as the victims is increasing as well.
For victims, all I can say is come forward immediately. Although it may seem difficult to comprehend, you are not alone. For friends and family that know victims, it is time to start saying no more. We have to stop letting people we know and love suffer. In many cases, they need that support to push them into changing the situation they live in.
One thing that we do not speak of often is verbal abuse. It is an epidemic often overlooked, but the mental consequences are devastating for these victims. People do not realize the power of words. It is wise to choose words carefully, they can make or break a person and many use this power to break a person, not lift them up.
Get involved and stay informed. When faced with the unimaginable, remember there are hundreds of thousands out there in the same situation and coming forward can help change lives. It is time that we stop being victims and innocent bystanders. In these scenarios, it is helping one person at a time and bringing awareness to as many as possible.
