Her heart was created to love others, and she used this unique gift every day of her life. Although she did not come from money, her philanthropy is well known throughout San Diego County as she put her blood, sweat and tears into many charitable organizations. When she saw someone in need, she would find the resources to give them a helping hand up. And she made a lemon cake that could not be beat by any other. And that is just the tip of the iceberg of her life, which she lived every day to its fullest, even in the worst of times.
Her heart was created to love others, and she used this unique gift every day of her life. Although she did not come from money, her philanthropy is well known throughout San Diego County as she put her blood, sweat and tears into many charitable organizations. When she saw someone in need, she would find the resources to give them a helping hand up. And she made a lemon cake that could not be beat by any other. And that is just the tip of the iceberg of her life, which she lived every day to its fullest, even in the worst of times.
We call her a San Diego angel. This is a name she adopted lovingly, as she believed that the real angels were the ones here on earth. The ones that live their lives daily to help a fellow neighbor, community or organization make changes for the better. And she never settled for anything less than all she could give to help.
Her life story is fascinating, filled with love, hope, and despair and hurt, and she took all of these things and made them the core of her character. As a young woman, she faced trials that many do not realize, but they made her a stronger person. She loved music and for many years owned a recording studio here in San Diego where she met some of the greatest musicians of her time.
A formidable woman, she demanded respect for everyone around her, but most of all she was a fighter. And fight she did. Diagnosed with Stage 2 breast cancer in 2008, other than beating the cancer, one thing she really wanted in life was to get her journalism degree. That’s how we met in early 2009 and from day one she instantly became a friend, and someone I chose to infuse into my life. Her nature was infectious, and the many wonderful qualities of her humanness, are things I wanted more of in mine.
As much as she loved life, she hated the cancer. Not because she was one of the ones who had to deal with it, but it interfered with her vivacious life. The only time I ever saw sadness in her eyes is when the cancer (or the treatment) knocked her down a notch and she was unable to do the things she loved doing every day. But most of the time, even then, she would beat it and continue on. Knowing about the cancer, she had a lot on her plate to take care of. And she did just that. With her granddaughter she was the most stable and loving parent/grandma she ever knew. Knowing her condition, she made sure that her granddaughter had a place where she was loved and had a hopeful future. She gave an ultimate sacrifice in finding her people that would raise her into the fine young woman she is meant to be. As hard as that was, she let her go because it was the right thing to do. Her love for her children was as infinite as her love for life.
I could spend hours telling you about this angel on earth as she met the challenges of dealing with breast cancer in every way she could. She hated the treatments as much as the cancer, as most of them encumbered her more than the cancer did at the time. Chemotherapy was out of the question for a long time, until she ran out of options. But even then, she believed the treatment was worse than the disease itself. Even at Stage 4.
I am one of many friends that lost this angel on Monday, but that is not entirely right. I may have lost the ability to see a friend, but I gained so much from our friendship. She may be gone, and yes I will miss her, mourn her and be saddened that she is gone. But what she gave to me in life—the friendship, kindness, laughter (lot’s of laughter), and her tremendous strength are the things that I will always hold on to and carry with me every day. Listening to her stories and spending time with her was filled with joy and thoughtful wisdom, even in the worst of times. We shared much together and I know she was destined to be part of my life. I do not know if I can live up to the hopes of being an angel on earth, but her life touched mine to the point where I desire nothing more than to pass along this gift she gave me freely.
It is a bittersweet New Year, but I do look forward to another year of life. It is the most precious gift we have and not to be taken for granted, but be used every day to make us all better people. If I wake up every day with this in mind, like her, there is nothing that I cannot accomplish. So for that I am extremely happy and grateful, and believe that the impossible is possible.
Besides, I have an angel on my shoulder guiding my way.
